Baird,
I have been trying to contact you, with no success. For some reason your new number didn’t show up in the missed calls log of my fancy new iphone. (Did I mention I got an iPhone at last?) After a little bit of lateral thinking I went back to the voicemail and sure enough there was an option to call the person who left the message. So I phoned you, but you were out! Or I assume you were out, perhaps you saw it was me on caller ID and hid in the closet.
So I replayed the message and wrote the number down and then updated it on my fancy new iPhone. I called you the next day and guess what? I had written it down incorrectly.
I went back to the voicemail and wrote your number down again and updated my fancy new iPhone once again. (I’m sure I mentioned I got an iPhone at last?) I called you yesterday and guess what? You have changed your number! So I kicked in the lateral thinking once more and sent a text to your mobile, but a short time later I got a message informing me that your phone had rejected my text.
Now I’m suspicious that you are taking extreme measures to avoid me. On the slim chance that you are not and at the risk of seeming like a stalker I engaged once more in the now nearly exhausted lateral thinking. As all 21st century options to contact you have failed I turned to my new and somewhat underused education. After trawling through ethics, pastoral theology, both Old and New Testaments, pausing briefly in Goodacher’s single source theories, plus a quick detour into Islam, Judaism and pluralist reasoning I was left with only one question. What would Mr Wesley do?
Well the answer was clear, but do you know how hard it is to buy a horse in Belfast these days? I next thought of moving into the Ballyholme area and setting up a house group in the hope that I may run into you at some point, but then I realised how much I really dislike the Bangor area in general. This left me with only one option, write a letter!
So Baird if you could phone, text or even email me your new number I could perhaps find time for a conversation.
Looking forward with some excitement to your reply.
None of my contact details have changed.
